Nick's New Favorite 'Golf Club'

The cute little cartoon animals used so sell this thing solidifies this product is made for Nick.

Yay! Browns.

Slow News Week For Harpers Review

-NASA revealed that the mysterious streak of light spotted by onlookers in the night sky above North America was a fortnight's worth of astronaut urine

-A Pennsylvania judge ruled that a police officer who orally violated five calves was not guilty of animal cruelty, pointing out that it was impossible to know whether the young cows were “tormented” or “puzzled,” or even irritated that the policeman's penis was not actually food. “If the cow had the cognitive ability to form thought and speak,” reflected Judge James Moreley, “Would it say, 'Where's the milk? I'm not getting any milk

-Marilyn Manson announced that he had swine flu but insisted he never had sex with a pig

http://harpers.org/archive/2009/09/WeeklyReview2009-09-29

Stephen Von Worley has figured out that while located in these United States of America, one is always within 107 miles of a McDonald's.

From Harpers Weekly Review

After successfully praying for his release from a stuck elevator, a devout Catholic in Vienna went directly to church, where, giving thanks to God, he embraced an 860-pound altar, which fell over, killing him instantly

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/austria/6166852/Man-killed-in-church-after-stone-altar-falls-on-him.html

From the BBC

Tokyo police have begun what is being described as a "groping prevention week".

Gropers can be imprisoned for up to seven years in Japan.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/asia-pacific/8254389.stm

Shirts Courtesy QMX

Nick's New Girlfriend

The second one is even called Top Dog!

Lego Elves for 2009(?)

Fuck